dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize