I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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