Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
