So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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