Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
