it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
