I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
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