and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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