I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
two words...techno handjob
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
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