This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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