She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
