ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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