The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
