don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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