My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
