i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Randomize
