Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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