is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Randomize
