Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
