i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize
