if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
