I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Randomize