Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Randomize
