At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
