Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize