what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
