If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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