she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
