"it" just moved
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
