i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
