i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
