ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
