I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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