I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
