Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
