I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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