A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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