Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
