Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Randomize
