great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
