Rock
Scissors
Fuck
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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