My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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