But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
