I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
