My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
