He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
We got so high we made milksteak
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Found your dick twin last night
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
