What did we do last night that was yellow?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
