Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
