Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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