woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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